Oh...Life!

31st May 2008 marked one big change in my life. when i drove out of Shah Alam, i felt like ive lost one big part of me. when i stepped out of dat tiny little flat, i felt like all da memories have been snatched away.

i love everythin in dat flat. the best crazy gurlfrens, da messy livin room, da TV-less nites, da clothes hung everywher, da smell of da rain at nites, da sound of honks in da mornings when someone blocked someone's cars, da sooo busybody mak Jenny in front of our flat, da packed parking spaces, da Pak Lebai who always stared at me n my gurlfrens ( i still hate him tho'! sorry pakcik), da evening tea sessions wit da goreng pisang n lekor, da not-so-frequent cooking sessions ( i made several dishes).huhu. da tapau2 sessions (nasi hakim, mcD when we were lazy to mandi n get out, KFC n hakim again n again) da locked doors, da Cradle of Rome mania =p, Yan's sounds in da mornin beggin for breakfast at 'Bahagia' =), da crazy nites bfore exams where every1 was so bz studyin (these happened once every semester. hardly seen anyway), my dancin routines and crazy video clips wit da haunted Manilow's I Can't Smile Without You and da classic Bunga Angkasa, da once-in-a-year house cleanin events and of coz da unforgettable our smelly but comfy 'beds' in da livin rooms.

i love dat flat. its more than just a home. its a place wit classic memories. everythin dat happened there was so memorable for me. even all da tears dat came in between our laughters and smiles.

ive learned a lot there. it happened to everyone of us. i miss every parts of it. wahida is sumwher in Penang (love, i hope u'l do ur chamberin here. pls?), tho Emy, Yan, Ery n Da are here. but everthin is not da same. we dun have a flat to crash in when we go out late at nites, we dun share da same address nymore.

i know everyone says life is all about changes. but it wont be as simple as dat, rite? one day they will get married. i will get married. but i still hope and pray hard dat our frenship and all our memories will be together wit us. their kids will be my kids (husbands are diffrent k? dun worry!) hehe.

this relationship is more than just a friendship. its a tie. wit a soul in it. i juz want Wahida, Yan, Emy, Ery n Shida to know dat i love u guys so much. u guys have a special place in my heart. no matter how terpeleot we can be wit each other, u guys will always remain there

My Worst Day

It's late and i just couldnt force my eyes to sleep. (Sigh) Many things have changed lately and maybe i was, or i am da only who doesnt want to understand things. How could i possibly know dat my non-stop mouth would actually bored someone? Not to da one person that i care da most. I really dunno how to put these into words. It's hard to explain things. But i guess it's easier for me to put it in writing. It's a good teraphy for me.

Sometimes, we just dunt realize how things have changed. I know da whole concept of 'life is all about changes' thing. And i know da best solution to it, is dat u have to adapt wit those changes. But then again, its easier said than done rite? I have some issues with myself rite now. Tonight to be exact.

Let me make it simple and straight. I have nothing to do at home. I do some stupid, silly chores. I dun go to work.(not yet!) I dunt have researches to be done. I dunt have to punch card. I dunt have to spend long hours at the office. And i dunt get tired easily after da long journey to reach home. And i dunt have friends around me to talk to. So, when da one person dat i care da most called me, i tend to spill things about my stupid chores, my boring days at home, my stupid, nonsense conversations wit my good old girlfriends, my meals, my silly dreams and my stupid believe dat if my left eyes blinkin, something bad will happen and etc, etc. And when i talk, story-mory about my pathetic days that ive gone through, i just dunt expect dat one person to be less than interested to listen. Wut more to give some sarcastic comments or remarks against me.

I just dunt get it. I know, i may be some useless, pathetic gal who have nothing better to do. And i dunt have any important issues to talk to. Im just no one. But at least, can u please be more considerate? Can u at least listen to what i'm saying. I may sound like demanding too much. But, NO! I dunt demand anything. Its just dat, u are da only one person for me to talk to. For me to share my life with. My days and nites. My so-called life. I am sorry if u feel like its a burden for u....I am sorry for everythin.

I duno why all of a sudden i get too emotional. Too absorb wit negativiy. A friend told me it was nothing. Da situation pushed me to da peak. To feel dis bad. To feel dis sad. I keep reminding myself dat I just need to hold on to dat love. Yes, im still holdin on to it..No matter what...........Even on da worst days.

Oh, God! Please listen to all my silent prayers. Today is definitely one of da worst days.. =(

Sitting, Waiting, Wishing....

It has been a month since i got back from Oman. Gosh, time flies rite? =| Rite now, i am in my hometown. Da city with lots of stars. Hehe. And i was really busy and that's da main reason why i havent posted nythn here. (not that there are many who wants to read. but wuteva! its my blog nyway..) I am proud to say that i am da driver of da house. who drives da car like a mad driver to here and there (as accordin to my mum!), buyin stuffs, fetchin my baby sista and my bro and my mum and my friends and da list can goes on and on and on.. I am also the maid of the house. Who needs to lipat kain, angkat kain, basuh kain, susun kain dan yang seangkatan dengannya. And it is also my job to list down and check my parents' schedule. It's a hectic life you know? But i love doin it.

By the way, there's nothin much to update. Really..Except for the part that i got a job now. And i have to like go for a ten-days-course in Kemaman before i know where im gona be posted. It'l be a nightmare i know. I heard dat we have to run for 2.4km every mornin for EVERYDAY! And it's definitely sumthing dat im not looking forward to. Sigh.. Apart from dat, im thrilled to go to work. This will be my first time working and i pray a lot dat i'l be doin great! Let's just pray dat im gona be posted in Putrajaya. Even if it in Ministry of Agriculture, ill accept it. I swear!

And there will be lots of things dat i need to do after dat. Such as moving out, movin in and movin on. I need to adapt with many things with da current changes. I hope it will be for da better...huh... And so they say... Life is all about changes.. It feels weird not havin to see ur friends everyday, not to hang out wit them (tho' they constantly annoy you). It's like blessings in disguise.... (sorry girls! but it is true. I still love u guys tho.. =))Sometimes there are certain people that u just hate to see but u still cant resist to see them. And it feels more weird when u see your friends are all working! And they work like hell. ( i still need to adapt with this)...

As for my life, i just dunno wut to expect. Some say like this. Some say like dat..I just dunno. For da time being,i guess wut i need to do is still... Sitting, Waiting, Wishing....... =|

My Day

There were many reasons for me to celebrate yesterday.
First, i got da necklace dat ive always wanted before dis. Its a pendant with my name craved on it in Arabic! I love it! Really.. I like da way my name was spelt. Its so unique. I dunno if they have it in Malaysia but it is like a trend here in Oman. So i wana get one for myself! Im sooo gona wear this necklace and treasure it. So dat it'l remind me of Oman once i'l go back to Malaysia.

Secondly, it was my 7th month anniversary. N God knows how happy i am. Im always excited each time 22nd hits da month. Ill be all glowing and shiny on dat date. Thanks to my dear boyfriend! =)

The fact dat ive went thru a lot in my previous relationships made me grew thru time. N i really appreciate dis relationship. Perhaps 7months means nothing for some people, but for me, it means da world.

Another reason for me to be happy is dat im goin back to Malaysia!! Yay!! Dun get me wrong, I love bein in Oman. Somehow, i feel sad coz i have to leave dis country. But, i left my loved ones for too long in my country. I miss them all a lot. One day, insyaALLAH i'l come here again.. insyaALLAH...

My So Called Blog

Well oh well....This is my first time bloggin here wit me havin my very own blogger account (funny isnt it?) Special thanks to my lovely cousin, Kak Long (though she kept on babblin n marah-marah me coz i know nothing how to operate this so-called account) U r a darlin Kak Long! And i know u know it... =)

Ever since i was young, (warning:im still young now!) ive always love to write. I think i have a passion for writing. In fact, wen i was in school, ive always had this tiny little book for me to write something. I even wrote some short stories and composed several poems. Haha. I was a poet in school. And i won several competitions to add to my resume. Too bad im not actively involved in any of those nymore. I guess i need to brush up my talents every now and then so dat i can be ok wit it once again..

And for a start wit my so-called creative writing, i wana start wit dis bloggin thingy. This blog wont be nythn extraordinary which talks bout politics or any specialized issues. It'l be sort of like my permanent diary. Where im gona write bout my life, inner feelins, love, my superb galfrens and nythn whch i juz feel like writin. Wuteva it is, juz bear wit me..

By da way, i'd like to mention my warm appreciation to my dearest Kak Long for guidin me in opening and startin up dis bloggin account. I know u r soooooooooooooooo gonna read dis. ;)